We often think of parents as faultless demigods that know life inside and out and have been through every possible situation that their children are or will be in. Is this the naked truth? The short answer is “No”; the long answer is still “No”.
Parents are prone to making mistakes – parenting is, for the most part, a hit-or-miss kind of thing and a learning process. Parents learn as much about different stuff as they teach their children about it.
Now, you might think that you’ve never done any mistakes in parenting your children, but are you able to check every single thing in the following list?
Did You Ever?
Trivialize Your Children’s Feelings
Does the fact that children experience human emotions just like everybody else make those emotions automatically trivial? This is how things seem to be, yes.
Parents – even the best ones out there – tend to say “It’s not a big deal” even if that certain “it” is a big deal for their children. Were you never scared when you shouldn’t have been scared? Didn’t you have your first heartbreak? Of course, you did.
You have experienced those emotions and have learned how to incorporate them into your life. This should have taught you how to teach your children how to deal with them and not brush them off or even worse – repress them.
Have Arguments with Your Husband/Wife in Front of Them
This can only have a negative impact on their psyche. They’ll start thinking that you can’t possibly have a marriage without bickering constantly and that the only way of putting their points across is to shout them.
Evidently, sometimes couples fight, that’s no novelty; this doesn’t warrant doing it in front of their children, though. And they can always learn how to solve their problems without fighting, anyway.
Give the Impression That Life Is Easy
Life is anything but easy. If you want money, you have to work for it. You might have to do what you don’t like doing quite a lot. Sometimes you’ll laugh and some other times you’ll laugh. You’ll have disappointments.
Teaching your children that life is all just honey and milk will make them grow into ill-adapted adults that will take even harder falls than they would have if they knew what to expect. It’s a hard lesson to teach but it’s invaluable once it’s been soaked in.
Use Violence as a Disciplinary Measure
If you do this, the problem is you, not your kid. Let me illustrate this with an example: my mom used to slap the living hell out of me because I sucked at math. Did I ever learn math? No. Did she solve anything by forcing me to study for hours on end with all kinds of threats? Also no.
Learn how to support your children and don’t do the mistake of thinking that beating them to a pulp will make them excel at what they suck. You weren’t perfect either and if you use violence as a discipline, you’re actually weaker than you think you are.
The Bottom Line
Being a parent is no easy ride. It can get so nerve-racking that you lose sight of what’s acceptable and what is not. Now that you’ve read the 4 aspects in this list, can you say you’ve never done any of them?
It’s less likely. Parents are big children – that’s the only realistic way of putting it. Consequently, they can make mistakes galore, even if they think that they’re the center of the Earth. This brief article will hopefully make you a more understanding and overall better parent.